Holding Me Tonight
by fantasymonk
Summary: Xel and Zel songfic where they discover each other... I seem to do a few of these, ne? Lime


Holding Me Tonight

Words and music by Carly Simon

Holding Me Tonight

By fantasymonk

Warnings: yaoi

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Slayers (I wish), and I am so broke. I don't make any money or profit, even, from these ventures into fanficdom; they are for my own entertainment and the pleasure of other yaoi minds like my own.

I've become addicted to songfics! I was looking through the lyrics of a Carly Simon CD, and thought this sounded so like Zel and Xel. Arigato for reading!

__

You say you're not worthy of me

But how do you know when you can't see

Your eyes where midnight catches fire

I can't describe this dizzy desire

Xellos looked over at the silent figure striding next to him as they entered the city; Zelgadiss had his hood and mask pulled up, being careful to avoid letting anyone get a glimpse of him. The mazoku sighed inwardly at Zel's paranoia about being seen. The chimera was so self-conscious about his appearance, when Xellos didn't think he looked all that bad. He had definitely seen far worse. It was quite warm out, and here was Zel covered up except for his fingers and eyes. Xellos cast surreptitious glances at Zelgadiss's eyes. They were quite beautiful actually, and similar to Xellos's. The mazoku followed this thought further, contemplating other features that he'd had the chance to examine during his time with Zel. He had quite a nice build, slender and not too muscular, but with enough definition to daydream about. Xellos had discovered unusual emotions in himself when it came to the chimera. He found himself wanting to pull the chimera into his arms at the oddest times for no other reason than to be close to him. He shook off his thoughts as they entered an inn. After Zelgadiss paid for a room, Xellos paid for his own, making sure to get one next to his reluctant traveling companion. This need to be close to Zelgadiss was puzzling in itself; prolonged time away from Zel made him long to see him again, to hear his voice. As they made their way up the stairs to their rooms, Xellos sighed again. Zelgadiss rushed up the stairs in an obvious dash for privacy. The mazoku entered his room and sat down on the bed. Getting up again, he left the room and tapped on Zelgadiss's door.

"Who is it?" the chimera called out.

"It's me," Xellos answered cheerfully. "I guess I'll see you at dinner tonight, right Zel?" he asked through the door.

"Mm," was the chimera's unresponsive answer.

Xellos shrugged to himself and went back down the stairs. He looked over his shoulder at Zel's door. Maybe he could get through to Zelgadiss at dinner tonight.

__

Can you be so insecure?

That you don't know what this grin is for

Do you think I always act this way

Silly and silent, and eager to stay

When you're holding me

When you're holding me tonight

Late that night in the inn's dining room, Xellos kept a cheerful smile pasted on his face; in reality, he was ready to throw up his hands in frustration at Zelgadiss. The chimera sat across from him calmly drinking coffee and refusing to acknowledge the mazoku's presence. Xellos had tried teasing, off-color remarks, and jokes, but nothing so far had been able to crack his companion's cool exterior. Just once, he wanted to see Zelgadiss with a genuine smile on his face. Xellos decided to try one more time.

"So Zel, what are we traveling for now?" he asked, walking two fingers across the table. When the chimera looked down to follow his hand, Xellos raised it and lightly flicked Zel's nose. Zelgadiss wrinkled it cutely, glaring at the mazoku.

"I," he replied, emphasizing the word, "am looking for a cure, of course. If you paid any attention at all, you would know this," he said, still shooting an 'if looks could kill' glare at Xellos. Xellos just smiled cheerfully at him. Zelgadiss continued speaking.

"Why are you staying with me, anyway? Don't you have someone else you can torment for a while?" the chimera grumbled. Xellos wagged his finger at Zelgadiss.

"That is a secret," he said. "Besides, you are so fun to tease," he added. He paused a moment, and then smiled evilly. "And you're so cute!" he said, laughing as Zel choked on his coffee. His smile faded as Zelgadiss jumped up from the table and slammed both hands palm down, cracking it.

"You fruitcake!" he shouted. "I wish I could get rid of you!" he said, turning on his heel and going up the stairs to his room. Xellos looked sadly after him.

"I didn't mean to anger you," he said softly.

__

You think it's all a mistake

That I'm lost in a dream from which I'll wake up

And there you'll be just another guy

You could never be but I dare you to try

When you're holding me

When you're holding me tonight

Zelgadiss rushed into his room and slammed the door. He lit the candle next to his bed and stood there, staring at the flame. Its bright glow seemed to be mocking him. Sitting down on the bed, he put his head in his hands. For a moment, he had almost believed that mazoku. He chuckled grimly. To think that anyone would find him cute… it was laughable. Running his hands through his hair, he straightened up. Even if Xellos did feel something, it was probably the need to torment him. If someone felt they loved him, they would have to be deceiving themselves. There was nothing special about him, unless you counted his appearance, and that was a curse. He stared at his hands, turning them palm up as he contemplated the stone texture. Setting his shoulders, he made up his mind. He would go tonight and leave Xellos behind. Perhaps then he could have some time by himself. A small part of his mind twinged at the thought of being alone again; Xellos had given him companionship and the chance to hear laughter. He ignored his subconscious and proceeded to start packing his traveling bag. He froze when he heard footsteps outside his door, and then someone knocked. Getting up, he slowly opened the door.

__

I walk into your room

You blush when I see it in a mess

So I undress and close my eyes

A room with a view

Is in the dark with you

But that should come as no surprise

Xellos knocked on Zel's door; he heard someone moving around, and slowly the door opened. Zelgadiss stood there, a slight blush on his cheeks.

"Zelgadiss, what are you doing?" the mazoku asked. He peered into the room over the chimera's shoulder. A bag was on the bed, and a few small piles of clothes were placed carefully beside it. Xellos looked at Zel. "You weren't thinking of leaving, were you?" he asked, suspicion in his eyes. He pushed past Zelgadiss into the room.

"Xellos, I didn't invite you in!" the chimera said indignantly. His eyes flashed slightly. Xellos chuckled.

"Don't be such a prude, Zel! I won't hurt you," he assured the other man, patting his arm in a comforting fashion. Zelgadiss jerked his arm away.

"I just don't want to be disturbed by anyone right now. I'm packing, and I need to get done so I can leave early," Zel said, turning around and placing more clothes into his bag. Xellos stared at him thoughtfully. Finally he spoke.

"Zelgadiss, what would it take for me to convince you to stay with me?" he asked. Zel turned around in surprise.

"What makes you think I want to stay with you? Besides, why would you want me to stay? I'm not much good for company, and I'm not much to look at, either," he said bitterly. Xellos started. Zelgadiss… not handsome? The thought had certainly never crossed his own mind; he found Zel quite attractive. Xellos made a sudden decision. He would convince Zel to stay with him, that he needed him to stay.

At the sound of cloth rustling, Zelgadiss turned around and squeaked in surprise. Xellos had leaned his staff against the wall and unfastened his cloak, letting it drop to the floor. He walked over to the table next to the bed and blew out the candle, sending the room into a seductive darkness. Moonbeams spread throughout the room, washing it in a haze of blue-white. Zelgadiss could see Xellos still next to the table. The mazoku slowly peeled off his gloves and kicked off his shoes. He pulled off his shirt, tossing it on the table. His fair skin practically glowed in the moonlight. Zel's throat went dry as Xellos stripped off his pants, letting them drop to the floor in a small pile. He kicked his feet free and walked a few paces closer to the paralyzed chimera. Zelgadiss could only stare in awe at the beautiful apparition in front of him. Xellos's whole figure was softened by moonlight, and his hair and eyes looked as if they were made of purple stardust. Zel gulped. Xellos stepped next to Zelgadiss, staring into his eyes. Then he sat down on the bed and lay back. He looked up at the ceiling. Zel's eyes got wider as the mazoku began to speak.

"Zel," he said softly, "will you stay if I give myself to you?" At Zelgadiss's gasp, he looked at the chimera. "I'll let you do whatever you want, if you'll stay with me," he added, staring back up at the ceiling. Zelgadiss looked at him for a long moment, then he turned his face away.

"Damn it, you mazoku, don't play games with me!" he cried, clenching his fists. "I don't need one of your jokes right now!" he added, still not looking at Xellos. In the moonlight, two tears sparkled down his cheeks, falling like liquid diamonds onto the bed. Xellos sat up and took Zelgadiss by the arms. He rubbed them soothingly as he spoke.

"Zel, this isn't a joke. I am willing to be your slave for tonight if you will stay. I want to be with you this much," he finished, lifting his hands to cup Zel's face, wiping away the tear trails with his thumbs. Zelgadiss bit his lip in confusion.

"You're… serious?" he asked, searching Xellos's eyes. The mazoku nodded, pulling Zelgadiss down to his knees so that he was positioned between Xellos's legs. Zelgadiss had placed his hands on Xel's thighs in surprise at the sudden move, and blushed as he realized it. Xellos smiled softly and pulled the chimera's face toward him, their lips brushing together in a meeting as soft as the moonlight touching their bodies. Zel shivered, and Xellos pulled him into a warm embrace. Together they divested Zelgadiss of his clothing, and when the chimera stood naked before him, Xellos gently placed his hands on Zel's chest, laying them flat and rubbing the smooth stone skin that begged to be touched. Experimentally he stroked his hands over Zel's body, finding the stone to be more supple than he had expected. Zelgadiss drew in a sharp breath and he placed his hands onto Xel's chest, tentatively touching the mazoku's skin. The shiver that rippled through the muscles he found there fascinated him. Growing bolder, he ran his fingertips lightly down the skin, stopping when Xellos moaned softly in his throat. When Zel looked up, Xellos pulled him down onto the bed and captured his lips in another kiss, this one deeper and more passionate than the first. Their hands slowly moved over every inch of skin, as if each was carefully mapping the other's body. Time seemed to slow as they discovered each other in that moonlit room. When they eventually collapsed onto the bed, a drowsy contentedness stole over them as they moved close together.

__

When you're holding me

When you're holding me tonight

It's not a matter of mind

The choice of the heart is a different kind

It's always been a mystery

When you walk into the room it happens to me

And when you're holding me

When you're holding me tonight

Xellos and Zelgadiss lay with their bodies entwined, happy to be in each other's arms. Zel looked up at Xellos.

"Xellos," he began, then he paused. The mazoku looked at him expectantly. "Why did you choose to be with me?" he asked, staring at Xel's chest and absently stroking his fingers over it. Xellos caught his lover's hand and held it to his cheek, relishing the contact.

"Because my heart told me that you are the one I love. For a while I've been thinking about why I love you, and the answer is, there is none. Not even I can fathom the mysteries of the heart," he finished, kissing the chimera's fingertips.

Zelgadiss burrowed deeper into Xellos's comforting embrace. Putting his head on his lover's chest, he sighed.

"Hold me tonight," he said, pulling the mazoku closer. Xellos chuckled and returned the hug.

"Tonight and every night, my beautiful chimera," he answered, resting his chin on the top of Zel's head. They lay peacefully under the watchful eye of the moon, surrounded by an aura of misty moonlight.

The End


End file.
